DIVTX141 - Mozeskriebel

Posted-Date: Wed, 27 Jan 1999 16:44:21 +0100 (MET)
From: "Anouk Siegenbeek van Heukelom"
To: [...]
Subject: Fw: MOZESKRIEBEL
Date: Wed, 27 Jan 1999 16:46:46 +0100
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>>>>>> IF YOU RECEIVE AN EMAIL ENTITLED "MOZESKRIEBEL" DELETE IT
>>>>>> IMMEDIATELY!
>>>>>> DO NOT ATTEMPT TO OPEN OR READ IT. This one is EXTREMELY DANGEROUS.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It will not only erase everything on your hard drive, but it will
>>>>>> also delete anything on disks within 20 feet of your computer.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It demagnetizes the stripes on ALL of your credit cards.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It reprograms your PIN code, screws up the tracking on your VCR
>>>>>> and uses subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's you attempt to
>>>>>> play.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It will re-calibrate your refrigerator's coolness settings so all
>>>>>> your ice cream melts and your milk curdles.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It will program your phone AutoDial to call only your mother-in-
>>>>>> law's number.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> This virus will mix antifreeze into your fish tank.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It will drink all your beer.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It will leave dirty socks on the coffee table when you are expecting
>>>>>> company.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Its radioactive emissions will cause your toe jam and bellybutton
>>>>>> fuzz (be honest, you have some) to migrate behind your ears.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It will replace your shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine,
>>>>>> all while dating your current boy/girlfriend behind your back
>>>>>> and billing
>>>>>> their hotel rendezvous to your Visa card.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It will cause you to run with scissors and throw things in a way that
>>>>>> is fun until someone loses an eye.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It will give you Dutch Elm Disease and Tinnitus.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It will rewrite your backup files, changing all your active verbs to
>>>>>> passive tense and incorporating undetectable misspellings that
>>>>>> grossly change the interpretation of key sentences.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> If the "Mozeskriebel" message is opened in a Windows 95 environment,
>>>>>> it will leave the toilet seat up and leave your hair dryer plugged in
>>>>>> dangerously close to a full bathtub.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It will not only remove the forbidden tags from your mattresses and
>>>>>> pillows, but it will also refill your skim milk with whole milk.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It will replace all your luncheon meat with Spam.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It will molecularly rearrange your cologne or perfume, causing it to
>>>>>> smell like the B.O. of that gross person nobody liked in high school.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> It is insidious and subtle. It is dangerous and terrifying to behold.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> These are just a few signs of infection.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> FORWARD THIS URGENT INFORMATION TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW IMMEDIATELY!!!

BRUN 07405 - Viruses, `The Mystery Glitch', etc.    BRUN 07405 - Viruses, `The Mystery Glitch', etc.   

Parodie op een virus-waarschuwing.

email-bericht

27 januari 1999

Het betreft een parodie op het genre email-kettingbrieven dat waarschuwt voor computer-virussen; het is in zekere zin een anti-sage. Het hele bericht is in het Engels, maar de naam van het bestand waarvoor gewaarschuwd wordt, is Nederlands: Mozeskriebel. De uitroep "Mozeskriebel" is beroemd geworden door het satirische programma van Van Kooten en De Bie. Het typetje dat deze uitroep steeds bezigt is de overjarige hippie Koos Koets.

Viruses, `The Mystery Glitch', etc.

Mozeskriebel    Mozeskriebel   

Windows 95    Windows 95   

Visa    Visa   

2013-03-01 14:46:20